Monday, September 26, 2005

Money Talks and Bullshit Skydives

Team Bullshit (Kyle, Brad, Steve, Matt)

Team bullshit has succesfully completed another adventure. The weather looked bad but we made our way to Greensburg Indiana anyway. We arrived at about 12:30 greensburg time. As soon as we pulled up I had to immediately use the port o pot in anticipation of the jump. A man came up and said "Are you all here to jump?" We of course said yes. and he says "Well hurry, up, we don't have much time". It is good to know that we are going to jump out of a plane in a hurry. The weather was not looking good. We watched an instructional video about skydiving and initialed 37 paragraphs about whose fault it was not if we died. We then stepped out into the hanger and got our harnesses on. My harness was put on by an older man. I was happy about this because I figured that the older the man, the more skydiving experience. After two of us had our harnesses on, the older man started pairing us up with tandem jumpers. My tandem partner ask me who put my harness on. I told him "the old man" and he said "Well then we need to re-do everything, that guy is just the owner."

"I already told you! I am not jumping in this weather!" This was the response from the first guy the older man asked to go up with us. Very encouraging! Since this guy would not jump, they only had three people who were willing to go tandem with us. Since there were four of us, it meant we had to go in two different shifts. In skydiving, this is called a "hot load". Your tandem partner is responsible for explaing to you all the aspects of jumping and landing. My tandem partner was in the air with my buddy steve. When he landed the first time, a golf cart was waiting for him on the field. He drove over to me and said "come on lets go get in the plane." He says this as he is strapping on his next chute. I say "You are aware that I haven't had any insturction yet?" He says "We will talk about it on the way up."

(Kyle being led in prayer by his tandem partner)

Have a look at this guy close up and tell me if you would do anything let alone skydive with him.

On the way up he gives me a five minute lesson on skydiving. Here is my situation now. I am at the maximum weight limit. I am jumping in weather conditions that have grounded one of the jumpers that works at this place. I am receiving my instructions on jumping in the plane on the way up. But, I am loving every minute of it. I figure that if I am willing to jump out of a plane, I am willing to do it under questionable circumstances.

At about 8,000 feet my tandem partner turns to the other tandem guy and says "do you care if I open the door now?" Keep in mind that I am not hooked to this guy yet, and I do not have a parachute on. I am at 8,000 in the air and 8 ft from and open fucking airplane door. He then says "Alright, stand up and come over here". At this point I realize this is all really happening. The guy hooks me to himself and asks "Do you care if we do a backflip out of the door?" With everything else that was going on I didn't see how we could not do a backflip out of the door, so I said "SURE!". At this point we procede to the plane door. I am hanging off of this guy dangling in the air looking at some corn field 8,000 feet down. The other tandem guy asked my friend if I was going to be ok. I think I went a little pale.

We Jump. Holy Shit! Unexplainable to anyone unless you have done it. I almost threw up. I am rushing at 120 mph straight for the ground. I feel like I am being shot with an automatic BB gun because of the rain. The free fall was overall pretty violent. Mostly because of the rain. You free fall for about 45 seconds and the chute is pulled. It is not a very violent pull as I thought it would be. The rest of the jump is pretty graceful. You are hanging from a rope 2,000 feet in the air. It was nice. Overall, it was a great experience and I will do it again. I really want to do it on a nice day when it is not raining. I recommend it to anyone.

Team bullshit would like to extend a personal thanks to Dee for taking some really impressive pictures. You are welcome to be a bullshit photographer on any adventure.

I will put the rest of the pictures on here in the next couple days. Peace.


Blogger fooiemcgoo said...

Weiners on sticks are called by any other name but hot-doozies.

I saw your blog and I wanted to say I LOVE BLOGS ABOUT THAT!

I have a blog about: "ebay, cooper, and wenis-cream". Why don't you come see it?

seriously, that was a great blog. the picture of that bald guy made me squirt pee a little. I wouldn't have jumped with that guy if the plane was on fire.

I am glad you are alive given all the crap that happened.

6:15 PM  
Blogger Tara said...

You are insane. I am very glad you are alive. I will stick to parasailing. That bald guy is one of the creepiest pictures I have ever seen. Hurry and put the pictures on here.

7:40 PM  
Anonymous Stef said...

That dude looks like my good friend Geoff. And he is crazy enough to jump outta planes.

12:44 PM  

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